Part III: A Woman's Job Description

Declaring the Praises of the Lord
Part III: A Woman's Job Description
Introduction: Read Proverbs 31:10-31

Last week we were sitting at the dinner table and Petra looked across the table and said, “Daddy, you’re so smart.” But before I could commend her for her keen insight, she continued, “I guess that must make you a girl.”

Let me set us up with a couple of qualifications.
1) Our church holds a balanced biblical approach to the roles of men and women in the church. We believe in the biblical practice of complimentary roles for men and women because we feel that it is the most fulfilling and least frustrating way to live out the Christian life.

That means we believe that men and women are created equally in the eyes of God and that God gifts the whole church for service and ministry. But the best standard for the church is that women not exercise authority over men because it is harmful to the health of the church.

This is called complimentarianism. It means that men and women hold complimentary roles in the home, in the church and in society. God does not place men alone as elders in the church because they are better then women or because women are incapable of leading the church.[1]

Neither culture nor personal opinion are the authority for this matter, it’s God’s will. It’s modeled in the supremacy of God the Father over all things. As well, among other things, it is modeled in the creation order and by Jesus as head of the church and in his choice of twelve male disciples. While there are deacons and deaconesses in the Bible, Paul and the Apostles only appointed men to be Elders.

Leadership is not lording over anyone,[2] it’s humble service; suffering- being exposed to harm, humiliation as well as (in some times and places) possible imprisonment and martyrdom. Male leadership seeks to protect women that they not muddy themselves in those things. It puts the men up on the front lines of the war against sin, Satan and the world’s attack on the church. And the women form the vital second line of defense, protecting the children and supplying the front with spiritual weapons. That’s all that I have to say about that, and if you want to know more, you can request the sermon that I preached last year.

2) I rarely preach specifically to issues explicitly related to women except about once or twice a year. That is regrettable and partly due to the fact that I am a man, a fallen man, and want to avoid dishonoring and trivializing the subject due to the shortness of time allotted to preaching. I hope to remedy that somewhat in today’s message.

3) That’s why today, I am not going to preach another sermon with 3 points and a poem on why women need to be submissive. I am sure you have heard enough of those. My goal today is simply to encourage and affirm the women in our church and hold them up as crucial in declaring to the next generation the Praises of the Lord. [3]

4) One final qualifying point- for the men: I don’t need to repeat what I said last week about nagging except to say that it applies equally to you. Also, don’t think that because I’m preaching to women, you are can tune out. As heads of your homes and of the church, you must model to your wives and to the children your submission to the word, which is the source of your authority both at home and in the church. If you are not in submission to the word, you undermine your leadership and the very source of your authority and legitimize your wife’s, your children’s, the church’s rebellion against your authority!

The Woman’s Job Description
So let’s look at Proverbs 31 verse by verse:
· V. 13- she seeks wool and flax and works with her hands;
· V. 14- she is like a merchant ship bringing food;
· V. 15- she gets up before everyone else to feed them;
· V. 16- she’s into real estate and invests her profit in agriculture;
· V. 17- she’s strong and exercises to make herself stronger;
· V. 18 she stays up late to make high quality merchandise;
· V. 19-22- she sews her own clothing;
· V. 24- she makes so much clothing that she is able to sell the surplus;
· V. 27 she always watches over her home and never has an idle moment.

Honestly, is anyone here, man or woman, like this woman? I don’t know anyone who could keep up with her.
Actually, I don’t believe that this woman has ever existed or is even capable of existence. She is a composite of an ideal women; the epitome of wisdom.

Let me explain that: 1) Proverbs is a book primarily written for men. That does not mean that it is not relevant to women or that women should not read it. All it means is that men are more in need of extra teaching about wisdom because men have more of a inclination to foolishness. For instance, in 2003, there were over 1.3 million men in US prisons, compared to just over 100 000 women. Men commit more violent crimes, more petty crimes, more white-collar crimes then women; they are more likely to die or kill someone else by taking foolish risks or breaking the Law.

2) What I find interesting about the book of Proverbs is that, while it goes to great lengths to warn against the foolish and adulteress woman, Proverbs reserves the greatest honor for women by personifying Wisdom as a woman.
Wisdom calls aloud outside; She raises her voice in the open squares. She cries out in the chief concourses, at the openings of the gates in the city, She speaks her words: (Prov 1:20-21)
Happy is the man who finds wisdom…. For her proceeds are better than the profits of silver, And her gain than fine gold. She is more precious than rubies…. Length of days is in her right hand, In her left hand riches and honor. Her ways are ways of pleasantness, And all her paths are peace. She is a tree of life to those who take hold of her…. (3:13-18).
So, throughout Proverbs Solomon calls young men to choose wisdom and he portrays wisdom as a diligent woman calling fools to knowledge. She is a true evangelist. Mrs. Wisdom reminds me of the Samaritan woman, who was once more like the adultress, but after meeting Jesus, she became like wisdom calling out to the men of her city to, “come and see Jesus, the messiah.”
If we were to choose another biblical attribute to be personified by a woman, I think it would have to be ‘Love’ and we would need to look no further than 1 Corinthians 13; here is my paraphrase:
[Love is a woman], she suffer long and is kind; She does not envy; She does not parade herself, she’s not puffed up; she does not behave rudely, she does not seek her own, she is not provoked, she thinks no evil; she does not rejoice in iniquity, but in the truth;  She bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

So, in the same way, Proverbs 31 is the definitive personification of wisdom in the form of a composite wife and mother. But this composite is not meant to make women feel guilty, nor is it their job description.

Actually, I think that this woman has it pretty easy compared modern woman. Listen to how one stay-at-home mother described it:
I'm a wife, mother, friend, confidant, personal advisor, lover, referee, peacemaker, housekeeper, laundress, chauffeur, interior decorator, gardener, painter, wall paperer, dog groomer, veterinarian, manicurist, barber, seamstress, appointment manager, financial planner, bookkeeper, money manager, personal secretary, teacher, disciplinarian, entertainer, psychoanalyst, nurse, diagnostician, public relations expert, dietitian and nutritionist, baker, chef, fashion coordinator and letter writer for both sides of the family.

I am also a travel agent, speech therapist, plumber and automobile maintenance and repair expert. . . .[4]

So if you read Proverbs 31 and see a list of to-do’s and feel like you’re not measuring up- then you are focusing on the wrong thing and missing the point of Proverbs 31.
We need to look at the principle that makes this woman so diligent- her virtue; it’s described in verse 30, “charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.”

You see, any pagan can buy flax and plant vineyards and knit sweaters. What makes the Proverbs 31 woman different … what sets her apart is that her greatest quality is not her charm or beauty, but that she fears the Lord. It is not a woman’s do-ing that makes her a Proverbs 31 woman, but her be-ing. And fearing the Lord is central to that because it causes her to rely upon God’s grace and to live like it.

Two external things that help to make her a Proverbs 31 woman: 1) Her children play a role in making her a Proverbs 31 woman (if she has them)- they will rise up and call her blessed. 2) If she is married, it is to a wise man who fulfills his role in the community,  “[he] is known in the gates, When he sits among the elders of the land” (v. 23). This is a man who has not shunned his responsibility to his community; I described him last week.

One final thing that sticks out and deserves comment here is that the Proverbs 31 woman is not a stay-at-home mom.[5] Don’t get me wrong, I am personally convinced that the ideal is for a mother to stay at home and take care of her children. But this is a modern idea (the product of industrialization) that one is hard pressed to find in history, except among the very affluent.
It’s an ideal that came about in 1950’s with shows like Leave-it-Beaver. Ironically, the woman who played June Cleaver, the prototypical stay-at-home mom, was a working woman. I’m not saying that being a stay-home-mom is not important, it is very important work- the best work a mother can do and if you can, then do it. But it’s not doctrine.[6]

I cannot think of an explicit command in scripture that says women are not to work outside the home and if they do they’re violating the will of God and sacrificing their children on the altar of selfishness. It’s not there. In fact, if anything, most scripture is ambiguous and vague about the professions of mothers- except for Proverbs 31, which is very clear.

So I’m of the opinion that it is wrong to make a dogmatic rule that don’t exist so that working mothers feel guilty. It’s no different then the Pharisees who criticized Jesus for not washing his hands when he ate or for cracking wheat on the Sabbath, not because he violated scripture, but because he violated their traditions, which they elevated above God’s Word.

Application:
With that said, let’s move towards some application. First, women, you need to relax, stop trying to live up to standards that are nowhere commanded in scripture. Just be… be a woman who fears the Lord and teaches the praises of the Lord to the next generation.

Children, you can help by being a blessing your mothers, so that they can be Proverbs 31 women. Support them in their work, love them, encourage them, don’t nag them, don’t disobey them, don’t argue with them about every petty thing, let them win some arguments once in a while, honor them.

The same goes for the men; Be a man who sits in the gate and among the elders and praise her in front of your colleagues, in front of your friends, in the church.

Ladies, here’s a secret, two things will make your husband more inclined to praise you: 1) don’t always remind him what you do as though it’s more then what he does (even if it is); and 2) when he praises you, don’t use that as a weapon when you argue with him about who does what.

Finally, ladies of Gateway, you are blessed. You are a blessing to us men. Where we would be without you? Without you we would be eating out of pans, wearing rinkled shirts, living purposelessly, vulgar, unruly lives. In the church there would be no worship, no Jr. Church, no Sunday School, no fellowship, the building would be a mess and I doubt anyone would even show up on Sunday morning- so thank you for all that you do. You Fear the Lord and you are truly a Proverbs 31 woman.


Footnotes are stuff I cut from the sermon, but didn't want to lose:

[1] not many wise, not many noble, God chooses the foolish things of the world.
[2] Leadership in the church is not something to be grasped, as God said to Jeremiah, “Seek not great things for yourself…”
[3] I find it startling how Satan has tried this week to oppose me in accomplishing that goal through discouragement. But his opposition only strengthens and confirms my resolve.
[4] (Ann Landers, May, 1988, quoted in Mom, You're Incredible, by Linda Weber, Focus on the Family, 1994, pp. 23-24).
[5] I went on line last week to look up how other preachers have handled this text and most of them used it as a proof text to command women to stay at home, which is the exact opposite of what this text describes.
[6] I’m not preaching this because there are so many working mothers in our church and I want to make them happy. If all I wanted to do was to appease women, I would not have said what I said women in leadership.